WHAT IS IT ALL ABOUT?
So you’re probably wondering, what the hell is a situationship and do they really exist? Yes they do. In one way or another we might have found ourself in a situationship. That akward relationship that you just can’t define what exactly you guys are. You aren’t necessarily dating or in a relationship with the person. It is a situation whereby you guys are more than friends and less than a partner in a relationship. You know that situation whereby your friends ask you what the status is with that girl or guy and you become speechless saying it’s complicated. Well you’re in a situationship.
A situationship doesn’t have a defined status, at least you guys haven’t defined it yet. You know that point where you are saying we’re just taking it slow, seeing how things goes. While some may be comfortable with this, others might not. You may find it nerve wrecking and agonizing waiting for your partner to take it to the next level, seeking for improvement but instead you’re stuck, you’re not moving forward, it doesn’t seem like he’s asking you out anytime soon and most times situationship involves some sort of physical involvement, you guys could be having sex but you know it’s just not something that happened, a fling or friends with benefits. Seems like you’re stuck in a situationship.
SIGNS THAT YOU’RE IN A SITUATIONSHIP
NO DEFINITION: There’s no title whatsoever, you don’t know what you both are. You can’t introduce the person as your friend neither can you describe them as your boyfriend or girlfriend.
YOU’RE VERY SINGLE: You have no partner, since there’s no title you can’t label yourself as a boyfriend or girlfriend to the person. You still do most things single people do, do most things on your own.
CONFUSION: You are perplexed about the situation, you’re always wondering what you both are and what you’re not. What is it leading to, would anything come out of it? You don’t know what to do and what not to do.
ROMANTIC ATTACHMENT: There’s an attraction between you both, most times sexually. You guys get intimate from time to time but it’s not your random hook up or booty call.
EMOTIONAL DETACHMENT: There’s no emotional connection in any way. You may have feelings for him but it might not be anything serious as it might have stemmed from the romantic attachment.
LACK OF COMMUNICATION: You don’t talk often, probably don’t see often too. There’s no talk about what you guys are or what you could be. You rarely know tangible things about each other like their life goals and future plans.
NO CONSISTENCY: You both are unavailable to each other, no constant interaction except when it’s convenient for you. There might be some random texts here and there but nothing too revealing and there’s a lapse in the period of communication.
HOW TO GO ABOUT IT.
How to go about it is definitely up to you. Ask yourself, what do you want from this? Do you want to end it or do you want to move it in the direction of a relationship? Most times situationships can lead to relationships, you just have to define them first.So the first thing you might want to do is communicate, communicate your feelings.
Define the relationship. Have a one on one talk with the person and state what you want, the direction you want it to go. If you want a relationship talk about it, if it’s not working for you say so, if you want to end it do the same. What’s important is that you’re genuinely communicating what you want or what you don’t want.So now you’ve talked about it, act accordingly. If you’ve both decided to take things forward, great, go on dates, tell your friends about it, keep a steady relationship, be consistent don’t just ghost on the person and appear back, communicate. If you’ve decided to end it close that chapter and move on. Don’t hold on to the past.
HOW TO AVOID IT
Make a list of what you want and what you don’t want. Know what you want and don’t settle for something that isn’t it. Also communicate your feelings with the person before things get too serious.
So have you been in a situationship before and how did you go about it?Tweet